God has taught me a lot over the past 2 years and I'm stepping back into the classroom tomorrow a completely different person. For that...I am grateful. I am grateful that I got to work at Journey Church with the most incredible staff and encouraging team. I got to be on the front lines of seeing people come to know Jesus on a day in and day out basis. I still remember the conversations I had with Lisa Bauer about the possibility of coming on staff. Tears come to my eyes as I sit here and try to write. I was really bitter when I left Wendell two years ago. I was tired. I was frustrated. I'm not sure I was a very nice person. But...I trusted Jesus. I trusted that the experiences I had there were for a reason, I trusted that he had next steps for my life in being what I thought was to be a stay at home mommy. And he did...I don't think I can put into words the gratitude I have for what the Lord has done in my life over the past 2 years. He is so good, just so good. I've learned a lot about myself...some good & some bad. I've learned what my strengths are and what my downfalls are, which cause me to trust Jesus even more so that people can see through the ugliness of my sin and selfishness and see Jesus.
I could keep writing, but I would probably just ramble. I actually wanted to write this post because I came across another blog post on Facebook (which by the way, I never read blogs people post on Facebook) that really caught my eye... This is it. This is why I teach.
When I sat down with Jimmy (our pastor) a few months ago to tell him I was stepping down from my position on staff at Journey to pursue teaching again, he said to me, "I thought you hated teaching?" I did...but I didn't hate who I taught and that was the root of my desire to return to the classroom. I love students. I love giving myself away to them and I love allowing the Lord to use me in their lives.
Never in a million years did I think I would be stepping foot into a classroom with 60 young 6th grade middle school girls staring at me. Just waiting for me to speak, waiting to see how I will act, waiting to see how I will treat them. Yes, I said it, GIRLS. I am teaching at an all girls public school. I never thought they would want me there...not with the little experience I have, but God is bigger than my 3 years of experience. What I hope that they see tomorrow and for the next 179 days of school is Jesus and only Jesus. That's what it's all about. Of course the skills I will need to teach them are important and I will do the very best I can to teach them what they need to know, but I pray for changed lives. I pray that somehow, even though legally I can't speak the name of Jesus to them, they see His love in me and that seeds are planted. And for the parents, siblings, colleagues...I pray the same. That they would see Jesus and only Jesus...